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Star Wars: The Clone Wars. My REVIEW of LAST 13!!!!


So, lots of spoilers coming, but I think it's fair, because The Lost Missions, which spoiled for me very quickly, should've remained LOST. First, let me say, I've been going around online and reading a variety of reviews detailing these LAST episodes of Star Wars acclaimed Clone Wars Series, which, despite issues existing throughout Star Wars, was, nevertheless, a pretty good show. However, these last 13 episodes they opted to reveal, instead of others they could've made in the first place, displays, at least to me, why prequels aren't really satisfactory in the end. 

Ok, so lets go over them one by one.
!!!!SPOILERS!!!!

1) Ep 1 CONDITION UNKNOWN; Ep 2 CONSPIRACY; Ep 3 FUGITIVE; Ep 4 ORDERS: 
This is the first known/reported issues of ORDER 66 going into action. 
Clone Tups murders a Jedi in the middle of battle. He's then arrested and returned to Kamino for inspection since it seems he's gone nuts. There, Clone Fives requests to stay by Tups' side till an answer is discovered. Later, we learn that of course Kamino is in on ORDER 66 *DUH* and that they want to destroy the evidence. However, before they do so, Fives is secretly examined and found to have the same organic trigger/chip in his head, which no one knew about, though the Kaminos say is normal for Clones and that his is working properly, while the Tubs' wasn't—that's why he went nuts and shot the Jedi.
Either way, despite the mystery, despite the suspicious nature of the Kaminos, the army made in secret built upon a bounty hunter, the Jedi dead and missing who orchestrated the whole thing and fantastic future tech of Star Wars—the ability to send data from one planet to another—they all agree it'd be best to ESCORT the "chip" and Fives to the Emperor, sorry, Chancellor Palpatine directly. Who, of course, feigns attack at the first opportunity so the CONSPIRACY to control the Clones outside of the Republic remains a believable side-effect of a viruslike contamination, as is believed the answer to Tups. Meaning, Fives is soon going to go nuts and kill Jedi. PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE OVERWHELMING SUSPICION!!!!
On the run, Fives hooks up with his old unit and gets a message to General Skywalker and his old commander who he asks to meet him. They do, but of course they're found out before Fives can spill the beans about w/e Palpatine told him (which is what set him off) and he's killed...the matter then swept under the rug. All's well for the Sith. 

Ok. So here's my problem with using 4 episodes from an ENDING SERIES to tell a side story about Order 66. WHO THE &*^$ Cares???????
Yes, it was mildly entertaining, but unlike previous stories throughout the Clone Wars, specific to the CLONES, you knew from the start how it was going to play out. Nothing of consequence could be learned. Nothing changed. Nothing added, not really. This wasn't an unknown battle or an unknown enemy that the Clones struck down without anyone being the wiser, yet adding to the overall coolness of the Star Wars Universe by exemplifying the Clones. Ok, so you learned there was an OPPS in the program, doesn't matter, the Sith quickly fixed it and all remained well. All this does is yet again point out how inept the Jedi are, though I'll go into that later in greater detail.  


2) Ep 5 AN OLD FRIEND; Ep 6 THE RISE OF CLOVIS; Ep 7 CRISIS AT THE HEART:
Did you know both the Republic and the Separatists are using the same banking system/planet for their war efforts? Did you know the Clan behind it all is leaning towards the Separatists, therefore not charging them interest on their loans? Did you know because of this they're screwing over the Republic?
Well, that's what you learn in these three episodes, plus an old love interest of Senator Padmé Amidala is at the heart of it, speaking for the Separatists, which causes some issues with General Skywalker—who of course has to rescue them from a bounty hunter working for the Sith, who is helping to push forward a much larger plan unknown to them all.
With the corruption exposed, Clovis is elected control of the banking planet, but this exlove turns out to be in league with Count Dooku and of course once that's learned, the banking planet/system for the Republic and the Separatists...yep, falls under the control of Emperor, oops, I mean, Chancellor Palpetine....The only other tidbit of information you learn is General Skywalker gets a bit violent (upsetting Padmé) when it comes to his wife's exlove: a traitor/separatist in league with Dooku, though considering you've likely seen the movies...DUH!

Ok, so my issues with using 3 episodes from an ENDING SERIES to tell this story about War Finance/Profiteering is as before...WHO THE *&%$ CARES???? The Chancellor becomes Emperor so we KNOW he takes control of the monetary system!!! The very minor substory with Skywalker and Padmé's relationship is, well, not enough and kinda assumed. Also, the little bit we get with bounty hunter Embo, while cool and fun to watch, was fluff when compared to the overall uninteresting and overall irrelevancy of this three parter.

3) Ep 8 THE DISAPPEARED Part I; Ep 9 THE DISAPPEARED Part II:

Jar-Jar and Mace Windu are charged with tracking down the....*sigh*
Nope. Nope. Sorry. I can't do it. 
I can't even give you the basic details of this. Lets just sum up these two by saying this is a horrible take on a Buddy Cop partnership, that means absolutely NOTHING in the END, except that Mace kills the Queen of the Night Sisters.
Seriously? Episode 8&9 of the ENDING SERIES and you tell a Jar-Jar *&%^$!@ STORY?
WTF?

4) Ep 10 THE LOST ONE:

Now, 10yrs later, we get back to the story/character of Master Sifo Dyas, who mysteriously took it upon himself to order the creation of the Clone Army, without anyone knowing and with funds no one cared to investigate for 10YRSSSS.
So, after luckily responding to a tracking signal, the Jedi discover the wreckage of Sifo Dyas. I love how the episode admits that Dyas was removed from the Jedi Council because his ideas were "too extreme", ya know, something about needing an army...coming darkness...bla bla bla...and Obi Wan brushes it off saying "Well, this isn't the first time we've been wrong." ARE YOU KIDDING ME? 
Never mind that, we'll get back to that. 
So, knowing know what they do, the Jedi research Dyas' death and learn the records have been sealed by the Office of the Supreme Chancellor...YEP...That's right. So Yoda goes and talks to the Chancellor, who tells him that was before his administration, he'd have to go and talk to his predecessor (though, couldn't he just open the files, ya know, he's got the title now? Damn...nevermind, we'll get to that later.)
From there, Yoda learns that Obi Wan and Skywalker discovered Dyas wasn't alone, there was another Jedi with him on the mission. Ok, so Yoda goes to talk to the old Chancellor about what they've learned....DUNE/SPICE REFERENCE DROOPED!!!! VERY COOL!!! But what Yoda learns is that Dyas was sent to Pike, to deal with a conflict there, not where Obi Wan and Skywalker said he ended up dying. And nope, the Jedi didn't know about this secret mission to Pike. From the ex-Chancellor, Yoda learns there wasn't a second Jedi, but there was another person, the previous Chancellors personal aid accompanied Dyas. *Oh, and why didn't the Chancellor simply OPEN the file, instead of trying to vaguely talk about it since it was sooo long ago. Facts: they're fun and useful!*
So, with all the issues, the Jedi are dispatched to Pike TEN YEARS AFTER THE FACT! Never mind Obi Wan did some kinda investigation into Dyas...Ok, I gotta keep going or I'll just get frustrated.
On Pike, Obi Wan and Skywalker learn the Pikes (criminal organization) made a deal with Darth Lord Tyranus (Count Dooku) and that the previous Chancellor's assistant has remained imprisoned since the death of Dyas. The Pikes were smart to keep something to bargain with. Obi Wan says he's heard of Tyranus before, from Jango on Kamino. However, again, right before they figure out anything from the innocent captive, Dooko arrives and kills him—though neither sensed the Dark Side—Dooku then kills the leader of the Pikes and escapes. So it finally comes to the Jedi's attention that the Sith have set forth everything as it is and that they have no option but to trust in the Clones and Win the war before the Sith's ultimate plan comes into fruition.


So, this was a great episode and aside from the obvious issues with plot, I think this was a good episode. No, I'm not giving Lucas or anyone related to Star Wars a pass for those things, but as far as being a good final episode in the series of Star Wars: Clone Wars, it's a good one.

5) Ep 11 VOICES; Ep 12 DESTINY; EP 13 SACRIFICE
This is a three part story about Yoda, the Force: Dark and Light and Life After.
Watch them. They're good, so I won't spoil them. 

So let me end by saying a few things.
A) The Jedi had countless chances to discover what was going on, but through Lucas, they appear inept to the Dark Side's plans, which, the cloudy-effect of the Dark Side or not, left a paper/digital trail obvious to anyone the moment you start looking:
1) Division of the Galactic Republic for a variety of reasons, mainly corruption 2) Jedi Master Dyas removed from the Council for saying a great war was coming 3) He was then murdered by Separatist/Sith Lord Tyranus while on a secret mission sealed by the Office of the Chancellor—Tyranus' name later dropped by an ExJedi then turned Separatist Count Dooku (they're one in the same and he was also good friends with Master Dyas and Qui-Gon)—and all this AFTER making a secret army of Clones with unknown funds bankrolled by Darth Sidious previous Master; the army being constructed upon a notorious Bounty Hunter's DNA, the evidence of that planet removed from the Jedi archives after the loss of both Dyas and Dooku from the Jedi Order 4) New Chancellor 5) Dooku is a Separatist/Sith 6) Clone Wars Begin, fulling Dyas' warning 7) Clones suggested to have defect that drives them to kill Jedi, leading back to Kamino/Coverup/Corruption in the Republic/the Chancellor 8) Chancellor takes control of baking for the known universe, after it appears the newest chairman of the banking planet was in league with Count Dooku/Lord Tyranus 9) Sith plot becomes clear, yet trust in the Clones they do 10)Yoda learns to live beyond the flesh, that the war/Jedi/Republic is lost except for the fact there will be another Skywalker.
Then we get into movie info...
And I'm sure there are a dozen or more things (previous seasons) that had the Jedi taken the time to look—which they would've had anyone but Lucas been behind the story—they would've discovered the Plot; which isn't to say the Sith couldn't have still gotten away with it, but it would've taken better writing and storytelling to both allow them to do this, while not portraying the Jedi as simultaneously ignorant and naive to the realities going on around them, on-top-of the Dark Side being an ever-so convenient way to hide things when backed into a corner. 

Finally, what these last episodes fail to even discuss: because to spread it out over books, comics and the new Star Wars Rebels TV Show over the next few years makes more sense ($$$$$$$$) than cleaning up all loose ends that were orig created by this show.
A) What happened to Darth Maul?
B) Asoka?
C) Prominent Clones?

So my overall for The Lost Missions is a C- and for the Clone Wars in all B+

What do you think?
Watch for yourself. 


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